Reflection on Project 2 Draft

Reflection on Project 2 Draft

In the post below I will be reflecting on my draft as well as planning what I think I will need to specifically revise. To do this I will answer various questions from A Student's Guide to Writing.

When I peer reviewed, I looked at Olivia Wann's and Joy Kosik's drafts.

Thesis

My thesis mostly focused on introducing the topic based on the rhetorical situations. Even though I did not directly mention them. I think I need to go back and fix this because other people were more rhetorically specific. Also, others appeared to address their audience more directly than I did. However, I thought that I was still able to direct it to them.

Organization

I think I could possible separate my paragraphs more. My first body paragraph is really long, but it discusses the same rhetorical strategy. I think I can separate the paragraphs where I start another example because it appears to be very long compared to the other ones that I read. I think that this will provide better organization and an easier read for my readers.

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Rhetorical Situations

I think that by only focusing on two rhetorical situations, I did a better job at explaining both of them. One, I emphasized more in order to show the greater importance of it. This made my paper unique compared to the others because the others that I read appear to be more consistent in their paragraph lengths

Evidence

I feel like other people provided about the same or a little more evidence than I did. However, my explanations seem longer. I realized that others had more concise explanations, which I am going to focus on doing.

Conclusion

I think people were unsure how to end their analyses just like I was. I was unsure how to go about this because I wasn't sure whether I needed to focus more on my rhetorical situations or more on my audience. I need to refer back to the comments that people left for me in order to add more detail.

Reflection

I read Olivia Wann's blog post, I realized that her and I face similar issues. I think that our topics of nutrition tend to be very new to our audience, but we assume they know more than they know. I also think that for adding quotations, I wanted to add more as well. However, I think I did a good job of this in the first body paragraph, but I need to work on it for the second. I also think that adding information from other articles might benefit my topic.

I read Joy Kosik's blog post. Her and I both had issues with the thesis and conclusion. We both felt like our theses didn't cover the full essay. We felt as if the paper had extraneous content that the thesis did not include. Also, we both faced an issue about our conclusions in that they did not seem to fully conclude our essays properly. Both of us need to definitely work on this by looking through the rubric.