Evaluation of Rhetorical Situations

Evaluation of Rhetorical Situations

In this blog post, I am going to evaluate three different sources on their rhetorical situations. I will do this by analyzing the author/speaker, audience, and context with the help of the Student's Guide.

Sugar substitutes: Health controversy over perceived benefits

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Author/Speaker [What can you figure out about who the author/speaker is, what their credentials are, what they do, where they live, etc.?]

Department of Pharmacology, Government Medical College, Surat, Gujarat,, India

The author, Dr. Kirtida R. Tandel,  is part of the Department of Pharmacology in the Government Medical College located in Surat, Gujarat, India. His email is ni.oc.oohay@lednataditrikrd. He also has another database journal article which is also about nutrition as well. This author values health and well beings of others, but wants people to be informed about the risks for the sugar substitutes that are artificial and not necessarily healthier than regular sugar.

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Audience [Who does the primary audience for this act of public speech seem to be? How would you describe them? How can you tell the message is intended for them?]

The primary audience for this act of public speech seems to be for the general public. The audience's values and needs could be specifically about finding out information about sugar consumption or just someone who is looking in a magazine article. I thought this kind of information message is intended for them because it is written casually and not too formally. The topic is introduced, and there are many subheadings that make it easy for the common man to know what they will be reading about.

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Context [What do you know about the information asked for in the bulleted list on Student’s Guide pages 180?]

The date of publication is 2011 October through December, and it was published through Science Direct, a science database article website. This means that the article needs to be informational and be appropriate for students and adults all over the board. The events of the increase of obesity could have shaped the authors views. The audiences response could be shock because they did not realize the serious impact of sugar on their well being. The event occurring around this article are also the obesity rates increasing, cardiovascular disease, as well as other health issues due to the high consumption of sugar in our diets. Also, his other texts relate because they are also about nutrition.

B, Hebi. "Sugar Trickle Spoon Cutlery Sweeteners Sweet" 8/26/14 via pixabay. CC0 Public Domain License.

Sugar Isn't Evil: A Rebuttal

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Author/Speaker [What can you figure out about who the author/speaker is, what their credentials are, what they do, where they live, etc.?]

David Katz, MD, MPH, FACPM, FACP is the founding Director of the Yale Prevention Research Center; President of the American College of Lifestyle Medicine; Editor-in-Chief of the journal, Childhood Obesity; Chief Science Officer for NuVal LLC; and director of the Integrative Medicine Center at Griffin Hospital. A clinician, researcher, author, inventor, journalist, and media personality. He also has won many awards and recognitions for his hard work and excellence in medicine. The author values the idea of tasting sweet things. He says, "We like sweet because mammals who like sweet are more apt to survive than mammals who don't. Period." He seems very adamant that sugar is key for our survival, and it is in moderation. 

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Audience [Who does the primary audience for this act of public speech seem to be? How would you describe them? How can you tell the message is intended for them?]

The audience is the general public. Specifically, it is an audience who loves sugar because he is saying that sugar is good for them. However, he seems to direct it more towards the people that are against sugar. The text assumes that everyone thinks that sugar is "evil", but the author disagrees.

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Context [What do you know about the information asked for in the bulleted list on Student’s Guide pages 180?]

It was published on April 18, 2011 and updated on June 18, 2011. This message is delivered through The Huffington Post as an informational and opinionated blog post. The contemporary events that could have influenced the authors opinions could be the fact that many people are obsessing over the harms of sugar due to the increase in obesity. Also, the brands that release labels saying "low-sugar" , "Sugar-free", or "no sugar" became a trend around this time. The authors other articles are either nutrition based or discuss raising children which relate to the topic of sugar due to the fact that sugar is part of our diets and we can choose to feed our children sugar or not.

Does Everyone Consume Sugar Drinks? 

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Author/Speaker [What can you figure out about who the author/speaker is, what their credentials are, what they do, where they live, etc.?]

The author is Public Health which is an Association of Schools of Public Health; it is the science of protecting and improving the health of communities through education, promotion of healthy lifestyles, and research for disease and injury prevention. However, I could not find any additional information about the blogger. If it was another author, it could have been written in more of an article form. This author basically just informed us about a graph of the consumption of sugar. The author values all people being aware of health. They care about the general public.

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Audience [Who does the primary audience for this act of public speech seem to be? How would you describe them? How can you tell the message is intended for them?]

The primary audience for this is the general public. Specifically, it is an audience that would like to know more information about the sugar consumption. Perhaps, it is someone who wants some reassurance that they are not the only sugary soda addict. The text assumes that there are people that are unaware of people's consumption of sugar in drinks.

A short evaluative paragraph about the text’s Context [What do you know about the information asked for in the bulleted list on Student’s Guide pages 180?]

This post was posted 3 years ago. The social media blogging site, Tumblr, is used to convey the message. This appeals to more people than a newspaper because more adolescents tend to use social media than read the newspaper. People's consumption of sugar increasing over the years could have influenced the creation of this post. Many people in America drink soda on a regular basis, and they consume their calories this way. The background of the audience and this article could be that they are avid soda pop drinkers which is bad for their health.

Reflection

I read Olivia Wann's and Jon Wirtzfeld's blog posts. It appears to me that we all elaborated on the rhetorical articles in the same way. We all developed our author, audience, and context. To a point, I think that I overelaborated compared to them, but Jon elaborated A LOT on the authors. It is evident that he put in extra time to research the social media of the authors. However, I think that I provided a lot more information on the credibility of the authors in a scholarly manner because I listed all of their qualifications. Honestly, I had no interest in either of their topics. I probably would never read any of the articles that they selected just because  it is not a topic of interest for me.

Final Project 1

Delicious and Nutritious: An Examination of School Lunch

Stef Antonopoulos. Uploaded 9/26/15

my_amii. “Homemade Chicken Nuggets with Honey.” 10/24/07 via flickr.

Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 2.0 Generic License.

Growing up, school lunches have changed before my eyes. In elementary school, the hot dogs and chicken nuggets were so processed that they bounced. In middle school, we were introduced to healthier food options, such as, cups of watermelon, cups of celery and carrots, and a salad bar. In college, there is a huge variety of healthy foods, but also many unhealthy food options.

All of these food options and choices are dictated by the USDA. The rising rates of childhood obesity are astounding. First Lady Michelle Obama has tried to take action in reducing childhood obesity by creating the National School Lunch Program which poses food restrictions on children. School nutritionists have gathered that this may not be in the best interest of the children. Furthermore, many children have expressed that this program has left them with tasteless options. Parents also have been involved in this debate since they are providers and dictators of what goes into their children’s mouths. However, Michelle Obama would like to continue to reinforce this act. Many people are against it, but it is in the best interest of children’s health.

Why are children throwing away healthy food?

Since 2014, Michelle Obama has been trying to impose the National School Lunch Program, a program where students are restricted to eating certain amounts of foods and receiving a specific amount of fruits and vegetables; however, students are not purchasing school lunches due to their limited food options. In the article Michelle Obama’s Federal Forced Foods Stir Controversy, it states that Michelle Malkin head of a food bank blogged, “School Nutrition Association’s findings — almost half of school meal programs reported declines in revenue in the 2012-13 school year.” The schools throughout the U.S. are losing money because Obama’s proposed plan is not giving freedom to the children. This plan limits the children and does not appeal to them.

karlhans. “H268 children looking for food in the garbage.” 3/31/09 via flickr. 

Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic License

Not only do students purchase less school lunches and schools are losing their revenue, but the children throw away the food as well; food waste has increased ever since the National School Lunch Program was enforced in schools. According to the same article, the Los Angeles Times reported, “Students throw out at least $100,000 worth of food a day.” Students are not consuming the healthy foods that they are receiving because they deem it to be tasteless or not appealing. Therefore, the National School Lunch Program is unsuccessful because its purpose is to feed the students healthier lunches; if they are not eating the healthy components of the lunches, the whole program is going to waste. If this continues, food service director David Binkle says, “[The food waste] amounts to $18 million a year — based on a conservative estimate of 10% food waste.”  Many students are throwing away their parents’ tax money into the garbage along with the food. In all honesty, it is more than just tax money, it is their nutrition which is important in order for them to grow and be healthy.

How will we get children to eat their fruits and vegetables?

This controversy on healthy school lunches seems hopeless for Michelle Obama’s hopes and dreams of a healthier America. However, many people associated with school lunches have given her feedback that could be useful in adjusting her plan.

Mills, Amanda. “boy eating beef chili with taco chips chocolate milk and pudding free photo.” 4/13/15 via Public Domain Images. Public Domain License.

To begin, the program could be more successful if it is accepted by the school nutritionists. In the article Michelle Obama’s ‘Healthy’ Lunches, nutritionists are opposed to the bill. When interviewed they requested, “strict sodium and whole-grain rules be rolled back, as well as the requirement that kids must take either a fruit or a vegetable with their lunch.” These strict rules lead to the children’s waste. The children are forced to take foods that they do not like, and these foods end up in the trash. The school nutritionists have noticed a connection between the strict food guidelines and the amount of food waste. They fear that if she does not adjust her plan, the amount of food waste will only continue. If Obama was to make this small adjustment, there would be less food waste according to those opposing the situation. However, even Obama wants to adjust the meal plan. Therefore, there will be a change.

Is there any hope for the ‘healthier’ lunches?

Despite the amassed amounts of food waste that the children have created due to the healthier options, there have been improvements as well. In the article New Healthy School Lunches Stirs Controversy, researchers from the Harvard School of Public Health reported, “...entree and vegetable consumption increased by about 16 percent each in 2012, compared to a year earlier.” After some time, it appears that students are consuming more food than before and wasting less. In addition, the same researchers stated, “...fruit [consumption] increased from 53 percent in 2011 to 76 percent in 2012.” An increase in food consumption is excellent news for Michelle Obama and the schools because there is less food going to waste; moreover, there will be less money going to waste as well.

Years later, lunches have become healthier. According to Foods and beverages offered in US public secondary schools through the National School Lunch Program from 2011–2013: Early evidence of improved nutrition and reduced disparities, increased amount of students attended schools with healthy foods and beverages by 2013. In other words, the healthier lunches have been a small success, but only after a few years. If this success were to have begun sooner, the food waste could have been prevented. However, this is in a sense like the light at the end of the tunnel because there is a small hope emerging and it could spread even more as time goes on.

Public Domain Pictures. “Fruit Face Kid Banana Smile Fresh.” 9/13/14 via pixabay. CC0 Public Domain License.

Also, there has been an increase in healthier lunches, and a decrease in childhood obesity. According to the article School Lunches Becoming Healthier, Statistics Indicate,

senior associate at the Food Trust in Philadelphia, Deb Bentzel commented on the faces of the students ordering lunch at school, “It’s brighter, it’s healthier-looking, it’s fresher.” The influx of student eating the healthier lunches has created a visible difference in their health, and the experts are beginning to notice. With the decline of child obesity continuing, many more schools could begin to start seeing visible results as well. In the same article, the author stated, “Mostly gone are the days of white bread and canned corn.” This would be a relief to Michelle Obama. Finally, schools are accepting the guidelines she imposted. With the decrease of sodium, students will continue to live healthier lives, and maybe more schools will begin to take part.

Public Domain Pictures. “Apple Diet Finger Food Fruit Green Hand Healthy.” 8/18/09 via pixabay. CC0 Public Domain License.

In relation to the decline in childhood obesity, children are starting to enjoy their healthy lunches. In Healthy School Lunches Might Not Actually Gross Students Out, Say Surveys, many students are beginning to get accustomed over time to their healthier lunches and enjoying them more than before. When asked about the student’s liking of the healthier school lunches, majority of elementary school workers said, “[students] generally like the new lunch.” Despite students previously disliking the healthier school lunch options, students now enjoy the lunch more than before. Due to the schools’ adding more vegetables and healthier new options to their menus, more students are able to find foods that please them.

Lastly, the USDA has witnessed significant increased in revenue in the year 2014. In the USDA’s tweet, they claimed, “...schools saw a net nationwide revenue increase from school lunches of approximately $450M.” More students are buying lunches from school now. This is a good sign because it could mean that students are finally accepting the healthier school lunches.

Unfortunately, the children still do not see the huge issues of healthier school lunches. In the article ‘A Concerned 8-Year-Old Citizen’ Writes Brutal Letter to Michelle Obama, a worried eight-year old, Peter, writes a letter addressed to First Lady Michelle Obama expressing his confusion as to why healthier school lunches are being made into such a big issue when there are bigger issues occurring over our borders. He later stated, “It all started because he saw something about school lunches [and] how ketchup is bad for you, and that Michelle Obama wants to limit the amount of ketchup.” He thinks that ketchup is such a small health issue for Obama to dwell on.

As he touches on later, he thinks that there are more important issues in the Middle East. In the letter, he wrote, “I also think you should stop doing nothing and send some troops to the Middle East”. He thinks that Obama is doing nothing because healthy lunches are minor. The school lunch controversy is considered to be “nothing” to Peter because it is more important to send troops to the Middle East because it concerns the safety of people. Hopefully, other students do not share such extreme opposition to the program. It is known that many students are against it, but they have not voiced their opinions like Peter; however, students have the ability and right to fight against the program. It could create many problems and slow down the progress of the program.

Why should we care?

Child obesity is a terrible disease that has plagued the United States. These rates have increased due to consumption of nutrient-poor foods, fast foods, and processed foods. Kids today consume higher amounts of these foods because they more readily available to them in their school’s cafeteria. Many children are also suffering due to their parents poor meal decisions for them, but children tend to spend most of their day at school. Therefore, the school needs to be held accountable for this as well. Students have refused to cooperate with Michelle Obama’s National School Lunch Program in the past. However, children have been warming up to it more as time has passed. If these trends of increased revenue, decreased waste, and increased child enjoyment for healthy food continue, Obama’s plan will succeed and possibly, childhood obesity will be eliminated as well.

Developing a Research Question

Developing a Research Question

In this post post, I am going to discuss the types of current and ongoing debates and arguments that people are having in nutrition that I might be interested in exploring further. Then, I am going to create research questions that will tell the reader why I might enjoy finding out the answers.

In my field of nutrition, there are many ongoing controveries going on today. Today, there are many controveries that discuss fats, cholesterol, sugar, and many other foods. These controversies typically cover whether or not these foods are detremental to our health. However, there is "The Great Sugar Debate" which is a controversy about sugar consumption. I would like to further explore this controversy because throughout our lives parents have told us that too much sugar is not good for us. From nutrition class, I know that too much added sugar turns into fat which is not good. Sugar is contributing to the U.S.'s increasing obesity rates.

Peggy Greg. "Milch-Jogurt-Fruichte" 8/18/14 via Wikimedia Commons. Public Domain License.

How does a high vs. low sugar diet effect atheletes?

This question would be interesting to explore because I would have to research high and low sugar diets. I would have to have an understanding of both before I compare to how they are good or bad to athletes' performance and/or health.

How have companies been adding sugar without the consumers being aware?

This question would be interesting to explore because I would research what are on the labels that companies put on their products. I know that there are many scientific words that are nicknames for sugar, but many consumers do not know this. I think this would be good to research in order to help inform the general public.

Are artificial sweeteners better than sugar?

This question would be interesting to explore because I already have heard many opposing viewpoints on this topic. I have heard that sugar is better than artificial sugars because sugar is natural. Despite the extra calories that sugar provides, it is said to be better than the zero-calorie artificial sugars because it does not contain chemicals. I would like to know more about this debate.

Is a high fat or low fat diet better?

This question would be interesting to explore because I already have heard many opposing viewpoints on this topic. I have heard that low fat diets are better, but the Mediterranean diet is based on at 40% fat daily intake; the Mediterranean diet is one of the healthiest known to man. However, the fat they consume is from olive oil. I would like to know if it is maybe the olive oil fat source that makes a high fat diet better.

Reflection on Project 1

Reflection on Project 1

In this blog post, I am going to discuss and reflect on my QRG. I am going to cover the challenges, successes, effective and not effective strategies, similarities and differences to past projects, and how I can apply this project to other coursework. The picture further below is a picture of a girl looking at her reflection in the mirror. I thought it was a pun to have a reflection in a mirror to represent my reflection on my project.

What challenges did you face during the Quick Reference Guide project and how did you deal with them?

 It was challenging for me to figure out how to write without writing exactly like an essay nor an editorial. I felt like QRG's are somewhere in between because there is usually a little biased toward the authors perspective on the controversy. In order to solve this, I tried to write in essay form, but I added more point-of-view by reinstating the opinions of the people that said the quotations. I also found sources that sided more with healthy school lunches being necessary for healthy children.

In addition, it was challenging for me to determine the sources that did not need to incorporate because I felt like they all would help better my QRG. However, I was able to overcome this difficulty as I was writing because I realized some of the sources had ideas that did not fully suit the direction my QRG was going in.

What successes did you experience on the project and how did they happen?

I felt successful in giving every perspective on the healthy school lunch controversy because I know it is easy to be very biased. I wanted to voice my opinion more toward being for the healthier school lunches, so I added more sources and explanations to those. However, I did have sources that opposed the program, but I think they made for a better QRG; it gave the other perspective without saying that I agreed with it. 

Furthermore, I was successful with my subheading. I had many people say that they were good subheadings because I made them questions. Each question posed was explained in the paragraphs following it. I think they were successful because I guided the reader in the direction that I wanted them to be in. In other words, I wanted to inform them certain things at certain times.

Lastly, I was successful with my images. I had some people say they were successful because they illustrated my topic, and they made use of the free space. I knew that I needed make pictures. Therefore, I made sure to have one picture per page. I felt that too many pictures might distract the reader, so I made these pictures somewhat large, but they fit where I put them.

What kinds of arguments, rhetorical strategies, design choices and writing practices did you find the most effective for your project? Why?

I found that the arguments that stated both sides and the separate sides as most effective because they illustrated the view points of both sides. It is good to give the opinions and information that pertains to both sides because this is not a biased QRG.

A rhetorical strategy that was effective was the usage of tone because it allowed me to seem more appealing to the reader. I tried to write in an informal and casual tone to appeal to the general public. More people are able to easily read my paper without feeling overwhelmed.

A design choice that was the most effective for my project was separating the examples into separate paragraphs because they paragraphs would have been too big and overwhelming for the eye if they were kept together. Therefore, smaller paragraphs made use of my space better.

As goes for writing practices, I would say that I tried to be as informative as possible without providing too much personal opinion. I think this was successful because many people write too much of their personal opinions, and it conflicts with the facts and information that are provided.

MIT OpenCourseWare. "Reflection in a Hand Mirror." 9/12/07 via flickr.
Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommerical-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic License.

What kinds of arguments, rhetorical strategies, design choices and writing practices did you find were not effective for your project? Why?

I thought arguments from certain social media posts were not effective in my project. I only used one of my social media resources because I did not think that too much opinion from people was appropriate. It was hard for me to change back to a non-biased tone if I were to use them.

I did not think a lot of sympathy as a rhetorical strategy could have been effective in my project. I thought that the sympathy could be given toward the obese children, but there were too many people fighting against the lunch program for me to do this adequately. I thought if I made the audience feel sympathy, it would be hard to transition to it and out of it.

They design choice that I thought would be unsuccessful would be a video. I thought a video would take away from the writing and pictures. I feel like a lot of people would just think that the video would have all of the information necessary for the QRG as a summary, so I wanted to avoid that.

A writing practice that was not effective was being too unbiased at some points. I did not want to add the letter that a concerned boy wrote to Michelle Obama because I thought it showed too much of the opposition against her program. However, I incorporated it because Lia thought that it would be beneficial. Now, I know it does help give my QRG some extra depth because it gave another opinion from someone who mattered (the children.

How was the writing process for this project similar to other school writing experiences you’ve had in the past?

This writing process for this project was similar to how our class in sophomore year of high school made our research papers. I had made my paper on childhood obesity because event then I knew that I wanted to be a dietitian. Like this project, we were required to do an annotated bibliography; however, it was handwritten on separate slips of paper. I thought those slips were very useful while writing my research paper because they directed me to the sources that I remembered and wanted to incorporate. Similarly, this project allowed me to go back to my annotated bibliography and review what the sources were about. From there, I was able to take out the information necessary. 

Also, we peer-edited each other's paper for this research paper like we did with the QRG. I thought it was beneficial because it is always good to have someone else review your paper. Sometimes, we get so wrapped up into writing our paper that we forget to incorporate background information or even some extra details that they might want to know.

How was the writing process for this project different from other school writing experiences you’ve had in the past?

The writing process for this project was different because we did not use as much technology to comment on others' papers. In the past, we passed out our papers and filled in sheets with comments. We also marked up the corrections on the papers as well. In our class for this project, we used Google docs's commenting feature to give feedback. I liked this, but I noticed a lot of people did not give grammatical feed back on the comments as much as people did when they corrected the actual papers.

Would any of the skills you practiced for this project be useful in your other coursework? Why or why not?

Yes, these skilled would be useful in my other coursework because I know I will have to write research papers for science classes. It is important to know how to cite, gather information, and to know the proper organization skills. I know a lot of students do not know how to write research papers. However, this project has helped me make sense of collecting sources through the use of an annotated bibliography. In any other research projects that I encounter, I plan to use an annotated bibliography.

Reflection

Olivia Wann's reflection was relatable, but I felt a little different about my QRG. I think that essay writing could definitely help for writing a QRG; however, it is not the same, but the basics of writing an analytical essay or research paper is very similar. She was right in how she said that the QRG's are more of reality. It made me think that the QRGs allow us to better see the topics written about because they are not totally biased or pure boring information.

Jovanka Potkonjak's reflection was relatable to me. I also thought that social media sources were hard to Incorporated into my QRG. I did not think they informed the reader enough about the issue at hand. I liked how Jovanka also struggled in writing her information because it is all science, and it is hard to describe every little aspect of engineering as it is with nutrition. Also, I thought that the research componment his helpful and useful in the future for other classes.

Clarity, Part 2

Clarity, Part 2

In this post, I will explore four more/different topics/chapters, and I will cover what I learned that was new or surprising. I chose this picture of a knife switch below because it suited the fact that the topics that I covered involve improper usage of words that require "switching". After going back to my QRG to make the revisions involving the topics below, I will make a reflection about what I learned from revising.

Ayl~commonswiki. "Open Knife Switch.jpg" 11/25/10 via Wikimedia Commons.
Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported License.

Needed Words (119)

I learned that many people decide to omit words in their writing. However, this could cause confusion for the reader and make the sentences have improper grammar. First, it is important to add words needed to complete compound structures. Second, it is important to add the word that if there is any danger of misreading without it. Third, you need to add words to make comparisons make more sense, such as, the words like or as. Fourth, you need to incorporate the articles a, an, and the when needed for "grammatical completeness". I found it surprising that some words lack their full meaning without these articles. For instance, the book uses, "We bought a computer and antivirus program." It makes more sense if the word "an" was placed in from of "antivirus" because these articles can be removed in directions or recipes, but they are necessary for readers.

Mixed Constructions (123)

Mixed constructions are made out of sentence parts that do not make sense together. This could be either involved with grammar or logic. It is recommended to contemplate the function of your sentence and rethink it if you switch grammatical plans. In addition, the subject and predicate needs to be comprehensible as a whole. For example, the book stated, "When the country elects a president is the most important." The book crossed off "When...elects" and changed it to "electing". In this example, the correction replaces the adverb clause with a gerund phrase which is a word group that can serve as a subject. It makes more sense because the part they replaced cannot be the subject of the sentence. In my QRG, I do not think that I did anything wrong with my sentence constructions, but I will definitely revise my draft to review over this.

Shifts (135)

Unnecessary shifts could confuse the reader. These shifts include: shifts in point of view, in verb tense, in mood or voice, or from indirect to direction questions or quotations. The part that stood out to me the most was perspective. I learned that first person uses I or we; second person uses you, or third person is he, she, it, one, they, or any noun. It is important to keep these consistent because it could confuse the reader if you switch. From personal experience, I said, "I was talking to my dad and he said that you could do this instead," I meant you to refer to my boyfriend and not to me. However, my boyfriend thought that my dad was referring the you to me because he thought I was directly quoting him. I unnecessarily switched perspectives unintentionally. Therefore, there was a misunderstanding. In other words, small mistakes like this could occur and confuse the reader to think something totally different than you had meant. In the book it uses the example of our and your. If we began with saying our, we need to continue to say our and not talk to the reader by saying you and our. It is also important to maintain verb tense. If you are talking in past or present tense, it is necessary for the writer to continue to write in this same tense throughout their writing and not switch. Also, it could be better to say "She also did this" instead of "Also, she did this" because it could be distracting to the reader. In my QRG, I need to go back and make sure I kept my verb tenses consistent throughout.

Emphasis (141)

To emphasize the importance of your topic, begin sentences with the subject and verb of the independent clause. It is important to use more prose to bring attention to the important ideas through adding an element of surprise or a twist. For instance it is important to coordinate independent clauses. More specifically connect the two ideas by using words, such as, "but" or "and" to extend the idea. I learned that it is possible to have a semi-colon and a conjunction adverb after it like "however" or "moreover". When I look back at my QRG, I know that I can make some changes to better emphasize the ideas.

Reflection

After revising my QRG, I learned that I needed to add semi-colons and a conjunction adverb like "however" and "moreover" for emphasis. For instance, I did this in the sentence "...a program where students are restricted to eating certain amounts of foods and receiving a specific amount of fruits and vegetables; however, students are not purchasing school lunches due to their limited food options." I  thought this did a good job of creating better emphasis in my QRG because it gave the reader more information on the topic. By linking the sentences together, it created a smoother connection betwen the two different but related ideas.

I also learned that I needed to fix some shifts. For example, I switched from beginning the sentence with "Also" to "Many children are also suffering due to their parents poor meal decisions for them, but children tend to spend most of their day at school." I did this because I thought it made the ideas flow better from the previous sentence and would confuse the reader less.

However, there were not any spots that I thought my work needed any words added. Also, my work did not need me to focus on mixed constructions because my sentences make sense. I think I did not need to work on these because I feel like previous teachers drilled these ideas into my head. I unconsciously knew to do enforce them.

Identifying Basic Grammar Patterns

Identifying Basic Grammar Patterns

In this blog post, I am going to discuss the longest paragraph in my QRG. I will comment on my Google doc that I created and address the following. The link to my Google doc titled Longest Paragraph can be accessed by clicking the link attached to its title.

• Six (6) different parts of speech

• Three (3) different sentence patterns (if you don’t have three; revise a sentence until you do have Three!)

• A single (1) subordinate word group

• Two (2) sentence structures

• Two (2) sentence purposes

Copy for Paragraph Analysis

Copy for Paragraph Analysis

Silsor. "Pilcrow.svg." 1/30/06 via Wikipedia. Public Domain License.

In this post, I am going to be commented on each paragraph of my QRG. Each paragraph will be analyzed on the following: focuses on a main point, develops the main point, organizes itself internally, links ideas coherently, and provides smooth transitions. After looking back at my copy of my QRG, the same errors have occurred. Therefore, I am glad that I went back to adjust them.

I noticed that my paper fits everything. I just need to work on my conclusion and add a little more development about the boy against the healthy school lunch plan.

Reflection on Project 1 Draft

Reflection on Project 1 Draft

In this post, I am going to be reflecting on my rough draft on healthy school lunches by referring back to the student guide. 

Unfortunately, I ended falling short because I decided to switch around blog posts without reading this one properly.  I did not commented on anyone's post in time. I was going to but I did not think the time I left would have been adequate enough to do this. I understand my grade will suffer because of this, but I hope that for the next deadline I could get this turned in, and it being better. As they say, you learn from failure. Looking back, I ended up not doing this blog correctly. I do not want to be a sob story, but my life has not been the best lately because I have been terrible homesick. I feel like the way I proceeded to do this was totally wrong which reflects the negatives feelings I am feeling currently, but not about the assignment. 

I have been contemplating about commenting since I can't be credited, but I had specifically looked at Olivia Wann and Lia Ossana's. Despite the fact that I had not commented on them in time to clearly say enough by the deadline, I wanted to say that both of these woman effectively implemented their views from their thoughts about the student guide in their QRG's. I noticed that they both showed how they did not think a thesis was as important in a QRG as it is in an essay. I know that in my QRG there is a thesis so I will see if I can make a less obvious thesis since their QRGs were well-written without it. Lia's sentence, " Due to the high ivory demand and current hunting trends, wild elephants might go extinct within the ten to thirty years." could be see as a thesis though. Therefore, I am unsure if this would be considered on or if I am over thinking it. However, Olivia's was "Although there is no artificial sweetener deemed perfect, there is controversy surrounding the company’s switch because of possible health hazards associated with consuming the artificial sweetener." Hers was way less of a thesis because she really did not argue anything. She merely stated the issue.

Hunt, Tara. "Audience." 9/9/13 via flickr. Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 License.

Audience

• My QRG will be read by my instructor and my classmates.
• I have to find out what their values and expectations are toward healthy school lunches; I know a lot of people are knowledgeable, but many are not.
• I need to make sure there is a significant amount of background information for my topic because a lot of people do not know the risks of throwing away food.
• I will use informal and casual language because I am able to talk to my audience normally. 
• I would like to make sure I accomplish appealing to the reader more because sometimes I write like it is an essay.

Context

• The formatting requirements are subheadings, white space, and images.
• Content requirements are very informal, but it is not over done. This is done in order to appeal to the reader and not to overwhelm them.
• My draft reflects the conventions of QRGs because I adjusted my awkward sentences so there is a better flow.
• I made good space of all of the formatting requirements above.